Saturday, September 27, 2008

It's all in the name

The first time I went to practice with the choir, my mom insisted on going with me because Richmond is like the gangbang murder capital of the universe or something, and she's decided that carjackers and murderers will be thwarted by the presence of a fat old lady. Actually, let's be real: Pretty much everyone is scared shitless of my mom so she's a good weapon.

Anyway, my mom went to Richmond with me to go to practice. And right off the bat, we got lost. Not totally lost - not yelling at each other and feeling really creeped out because OH MY GOD WE'RE IN RICHMOND IT'S LIKE DETROIT BY THE BAY and where the hell are we and would you just call someone and have them Google map it lost. But still a little lost: We drove around the same block three times, wondering where this church could possibly be, since all we saw were the Safeway and the WaMu - both landmarks I'd been told to look for - and a bunch of houses. In fact, if I hadn't seen the "Welcome to Richmond" sign just a little ways before on San Pablo, I'd have wondered if we were still in El Cerrito. It certainly didn't feel like Big, Bad Richmond.

Deciding to give it one last shot, we crossed San Pablo and went to the only church we could see within a multi-block radius: Church of Christ. I felt a little tightness in my chest: The only other time I'd sung in a choir before was at Glide Memorial in San Francisco. While technically a United Methodist church, Glide was decidedly... un-Jesus-y. OK, fine, we sang plenty of songs with the JC in them and more than one sermon focused on the words of Christ and every once and a while I would look over at the other Jewish member of the choir and mouth that Jesus liked her better than me. So Jesus was there, but just not as there as he (He?) might be in the Church of Christ. I mean, Jesus is right in the name of the church.

Plus, wasn't Church of Christ, like, super Christian?

It seemed like it was going to be a lot more than I'd bargained for. I got nervous. Maybe this was a bad idea.

We parked the car, and both of us got out. We walked down the street, toward the church, along a row of houses. As we passed a fence, I saw a sign and pointed to it, telling my mom I should get one for her to post near her driveway: a line drawing looking straight down the barrel of a gun, next to the words DON'T EVEN THINK OF PARKING HERE. It was very welcoming.

The church was located right on a corner, across from the WaMu parking on one side and a carwash parking lot on the other. The freeway overpass soared above the unassuming building, which thankfully wasn't one of those hideous churches from '80s, awkward and ugly and looming. It was on the smaller side, sort of stucco on the outside painted a pale pinkish color. The steps lead from the block's corner up to a set of double wooden doors, a nice sunny wood, not heavy and dark and forbidding.

Sitting on the steps of the church was a young white woman, holding some sheet music in her hand. I was surprised to see her there. I'm pretty sure she was surprised to see me there, even if she had a better poker face than I. The group I'd seen perform, Joyfull Noize, had been all black. That was the group I had thought I was coming to sing with, given the conversations I'd had with the group's leader. This girl was definitely white. Then again, so was I. But she definitely wasn't Jewish, so she was one up on me.

I walked up to her. "Hi. Is this practice for Joyfull Noize?"
"I'm sorry?" she said.
"Joyfull Noize," I repeated. "Is this where they practice?"
"No," she replied. "This is Bay Area Mass Chorus."
"Oh. Thanks."

Feeling slightly relieved that I wouldn't have to go in to a Church of Christ, and then sort of guilty for feeling relieved, I got back in the car.

Later that week, the leader of the choir called me and asked where I'd been. I told her my mom and I had driven around - making sure I emphasized the mom part, for guilt purposes and for references if necessary - unable to find the church. She was so surprised, telling me how easy it was to find. And then I told her:

"We did see one church, Church of Christ. But when I asked a girl sitting on the steps waiting, she said the practice at noon was for some other group."

With a big sound of surprise, Efeann explained, "I work with two different groups. That's the choir you were coming to sing with: The Bay Area Mass Chorus. I'm so sorry for the confusion." Confusion indeed: Not only had I gone to the right place and missed the practice anyway, I was joining a totally different group than I'd signed up for. Did I even want to do this?

Yet somehow, there I was, agreeing to come try again the following Saturday. "You'll love it," I heard her telling me again. "It's a really diverse group."

Church of Christ? I had a week to prepare.


Jeremy Harris said...

I'm not scared shitless of your Mom, and I LOVE the title of this blog.

Leah said...

Hell yes you do, Jeremy. I mean heck. Also thanks!

. said...


Do I need to resurrect the blogger account now? Damn.


alison said...

"It was very welcoming." This is why I love you! (Well, lots of reasons, but that made me laugh a lot.)